My Fairytale Fantasy

hai... emotions abound? gah..

Feeling something new, exciting and foreign.. while still harbouring something longing, regretful and memory filled. Ugh. Go away stupid feelings..

Family is like the roots of our foundation isn’t it? A parent’s relationship with a child is of utmost importance for their survival and development as a well-respected person in society. My dad came back home from overseas for a short break and I met up with him yesterday. Am I still mad? Not really. Why? I don’t know. I just can’t stay mad at people for a long time.. good and bad I guess.

Hai.. this term’s progress report was simply horrible. Initially tried to come up with excuses for myself, to soothe the ugly reality of the situation. Not a good idea. Better to face reality and work harder I realized. But it is still so very hard to sit down and concentrate. I know I can go on lesser ‘outings’ with the oacians and study instead, but.. what would become of the kind of life I lead? I shudder at looking at a life filled with studies only, I will never be able to do that. Never would want to do that actually. And also, I don’t want to be anymore distant from them as I only just started knowing them, and being accepted into the team has already been such a blessing. Will not do anything to jeopardise that.

What’s there to look forward to now? May seem like nothing.. But actually, I think there’s a lot waiting for me, hiding around the corner ready to spring out and shout “Surprise!”. Well, I shall embrace whatever it is with an open heart and an open mind.

Now comes the next problem.. End year expedition or Tian Jing Exchange??? ARGH. I hate that choice. Why on earth must the 2 dates clash so inevitably. Annoying. Really. And now, I don’t know whether I might miss my Segundo exam. If I do, my chances of getting into the company class next year will go up in smoke. ‘Poof!’ Hai.. Life. I really want to go for the exchange programme, I think it would be such a good experience.. Then again, I really really want to go for the end year expedition, wherever they are going. Blah. Now comes down to which I want more I guess.. At this point in time, I can so simply and easily say, “End year expedition for sure.” My mum already does not need any convincing, she said she would let me go wherever I want to, but wishes I could go to both places. Love her. I know she would rather I go to Tian Jing, but she knows how much the end year expeditions mean. So thankful to have a mother like her. My buddy’s family is already expecting me to go for the exchange programme, the teachers are expecting that too. I’ve been given so many opportunities but I can’t choose all. Darn. I have to decide soon.. someone please say something to make me sway to one side!!! Anyone?

*sigh* need to get back to my language arts short story now.. adios amigos *