`+._ sOrRoW _.+`



Hi all.. Sorry I haven't been updating.. Well, my grandfather passed away on Saturday. I was heartbroken. He brought me up since young and we saw each other everyday. He was such a big part of my life... It pains me to finally say goodbye to him. But now I have learnt to accept it and keep him in my heart, but i miss him so so so much... I can still imagine him doing what he usually does.. Thanks goodness my memories of him now are of all the good times we shared before he got ill. Even up to now, his death still feels surreal to me. It's like I expect him to walk into the room and say, 'ah sian ah, bang wo ying ze ge ke yi ma?' I feel like crying everytime. Everywhere holds his memories. He thought me how to do so many things and loved me unconditionally. He used to bring me around to so many places, school, the library, shopping centres, food courts, market. Such a big part of my life has gone. But at least he is not suffering now... Even as I'm typing, tears are falling, I miss him so much... Life will never be the same, but I'll have to start anew and accept it. This is a first time experience and eye opener for me.. Today we went to collect his ashes. What an experience.. His bones were brown on the inside due to cancer. The sending of and collecting of ahses today were painful, but not as painful as the day he passed away. I miss him and will always remember him and love him. Ah Kong, Wo Ai Ni .

`+._ cLaSsRoOm DeSiGn WoRkShOp _.+`



Hi! The last time I updated was on Monday if i'm not wrong. Lots have happened since then, especially on the design of the classroom. The second day of the workshop we went to this place called SOHO (small office, home office) to get design ideas. The show flats were GORGEOUS. I loved it, so did my classmates. It was soooo cool. Since it was a office plus home, the bed was on a raised platform, like attic style (have pics in my xanga site), so awesome!!! But the discussion was hell. The whole class couldn't come to an agreement on what we should have done. I lost my voice then. -.- So sad, now I'm having both cough and sore throat. For some reason, I get cough so often, it's so sickening. Finally when some people left, and only a few remained, we came to the concept we liked to call, the treehouse concept. We wanted to make the class as homely and comfortable as possible. We were going to paint the back walls from dark green to light green, the right and left side wall in stripes in different shades of brown for the top part, and dark wood for the bottom part. The front where the whiteboard was would be the colour called "just peachy". The floors were a major issue, we wanted linoleum flooring, but it would cost about $1,800. That was alllooottt. About 9000 HK. The budget went waaay overcost, so we settle with painting the floor, though we didn't really like the idea. The next day we went to IKEA. Scouted for affordable yet condusive furniture, but we weren't given much time, so everything was very rushed. Once we went back, we started on making the mock-up version of how our classroom would be like (pics in xanga). We worked till 7pm. Today, we worked on our mock-up classroom once again till about 11.30am. I was in-charge of mock-up, so we concentrated on that. I'm quite proud to say that my team mates did a good job, I'm proud of what we accomplished. At around 1.10pm, the presentations for all 5 classes to present their idea for the class was held. Let's just say I didnt know where to hide my face for my group's presentation. We were hoping that the mock-up presentation would give us time to let those who know the mock-up settings to explain it. Sadly, we were only given 5 minutes, we couldn't present anything!!! =( In the end, we just got consolation prize. The group whose seating arrangements were in a huge X formation won. That group was soooo sucking up to the judges, we were revolted. But looks like it helped them win. Personally, we all preferred our classroom. I guess it's a definate. We suited the class to how the people in the class would like it. I still love our class the best. While the judges were deciding on the results, we were to go and see our PDPs(co-curricular-activities). I signed up for Dance, Outdoor Activities Club(OAC) and Astronomy Club. Our teacher recommends only 1 PDP though... I think I'll go for OAC, it's the most interesting. Hiking, climbing mountains, kayaking, interacting with nature, oh bliss!!! ^^ Hopefully I can also take up astronomy... It's on Friday nights(groan, no going out)... Oh well, see first!!! =) These few days besides the class design thing has been a very emotional rollercoaster for me. Some people will know what I mean. Let's just say a relative is sick. I've been crying so much my eyes get puffy and sore in the mornings. But life must go on, I have to be strong. I'll end here, check out the pictures in my xanga web!! ^^

`+._ a DaY oF eMoTiOnS aNd CaMp _.+`

Hi all!~ Let's just say the news I heard yesterday made me break down again. *sigh* I hate all this crying. But that's life. Yesterday when I was in the hospital, I saw a family whose father was given that night and this day to live only. Their family was grief-stricken. My heart went out to them and I felt so so sad as well. What a horrible feeling, knowing the family member you love so much lying on the bed, going to leave you any minute. We can never take the ones we love for granted. That made me think of the mysteries of the world. What happens after death, what happens in the Bermuda Triangle, what's in the Black Hole and etc. So many people have different theories about what happens after death. Christians believe that they go back to live with God, Buddhists believe in reincarnation, other religions believe in other things. Who knows in the Bermuda Triangle, people living there are in pure bliss, rid of all heartaches and troubles, but yet again, it could be a land of slavery and a place where sufferings never end. I am so curiuos about those things. I sometimes just sit and wonder about these things, especially about the great big Universe. That's why I'm so interested in joining TJC's astronomy club, I want to learn more about the Universe. Oh yeah, I bought a webcam and mike!!! Whoopee!!! ^^ I also created a xanga site, but the content is going to be the same as this blog. Click Here. Today I had TJC orientation camp. Well, all the Temasekians are in the same class, along with some from TKGS and VS. Hm... There's only 23 people in the class, 15 girls and 8 guys -.- Now girls are overpowering instead of guys. Haha. I made some new friends, Sophia, Dimira, Teresa, Grace... They were all friendly. There were a group of girls who are very outgoing. Not the type I'll mix with I can fortell. Thank God Prerna is in the same class as me. Phew. The most enjoyable part of camp was when we played in the rain! It was awesome. By 7pm, I kept yawning and yawning in the lecture theatre. By the time I came home, it was 8.30pm. TJC wants us to get a laptop, preferably a tablet, so my mum is going to get my one, most of my friends are getting theirs as well. I don't think I have much else to say for now, so... Goodnight!!!~

`+._ BaCk HoMe!! _.+`



Hi! I'm back home in Singapore now. First part of this entry shall be on what I did, second part will be more on feelings.

Well, let me recall... I seriously can't remember what we did on Wednesday, oh no, my memory's going.. I think we went shopping... Oh yeah, now I remember.. We went to the factory outlets! Hehes.. I bought two awesome jackets, 2 exercise tops, a nice floral 3/4 sleeve t-shirt and a white skirt. All originals, but cheaper! ^^ Haha, then we went back for dinner I think. On Thursday, I followed Louiseanne to go for study session on Maths, ha, rekindled the stimultaneous equations thingy *grimace*. On Friday, we went out with her friends, Natalie, Grace, Jeremy, Max and Eugene. They were all really nice ^^. We watched Kung Fu Hustle. God that movie is gory. I covered my eyes most of the time anyways. But it was overall quite funny in the end, but I couldn't stand the fighting and the blood *shudders* We took neoprints and then we had to leave for... Christmas eve dinner at Louiseanne's home. I didn't really know many people there and for some reason at the beginning of the party, I kind of felt weird. Real weird. Not in the festive mood at all. Feeling sad about something I couldn't place my finer on. Funnily, Louiseanne felt the same way, I felt better after awhile though. When the clock striked midnight, not many people from Singapore were online so not many people to wish *sigh* It was kind of boring, and Louiseanne helped me set up a Xanga site. I still don't know how to use it, so I shall continue using blogger till I've grasp the concept of Xanga =P On Christmas Day, Lu*(short for Louiseanne) had community service =(, so we had lunch without her. Lunch was with old family friends whom I haven't seen in 9 years. Their children, Daphne and Kai are so grown up now, well I guess so are we. My dad said Kai and I used to fight alot when we stayed with them for holiday, but I seriously can't remember. Christmas night, it was PARTY! for Lu* and I. We went to a street where there were pubs, discos, bars etc. My dad brought us. We dressed up all in black (except overcoat and shoes) and in our best since it was my last night there. I wore her high heels and my feet were killing me. Seriously. We had some alcohol, 4.7% bottle. I only drank half though, Lu* drank all and wanted more =P

That about sums up what we did when I was in Hong Kong, but that doesn't say a single thing about how I was feeling ya?

Well, I'll let you in on some feelings then, some people say my blog is like a content of what I did, so I'll add more thoughts. You can say that the reason I went to Hong Kong was to see Louiseanne this trip. It felt so good to get along so well with her once again, but sadly, it wasn't the same with Jonathan, like I mentioned in the previous entry, he seems kind of distant. Oh well... We used to play together, all 3 of us. Those were the days. In a way, I envy Louiseanne, she has a few close guy friends whom she can count on whom are so nice and caring at the same time. Don't get me wrong, my gal friends etc Maxine, Prerna, Zhuyin, Aud, Lijun, Lin, Mar, Zoe, Cad, Yuan, kirbs, lumps, Via, Jo and Abby are awesome, but sometimes, it isn't the same as having a guy friend you know. I've always wanted a close guy friend who would care for me like a older brother would and give me advice sometimes. I envy the friendship Lu* has. Oh well, I am in a way satisfied with what I have now, my friends all rock! Bah, this is sad, I shouldn't be feeling this way. Hm, this bonding time I've had with Lu* made me realise that what's important in a friendship is honesty and sincerity. Being fake has completely no use in a friendship, you will be exposed of true colours sooner of later. Well, all in all, I must say this trip was worth it. I made some really nice new friends, had some fun in the cold weather, went shopping, and most importantly, strengthened my friendship with Lu*!!! Love ya and miss ya Lu*. I'll post some pictures from the trip when I have time. That's all for now, and that's quite alot! Goodnight!~ Good morning more like it =P

`+._ iN hOnG kOnG!!! _.+`



Hi everyone!!! First things first, HAPPY BIRTHDAY EN !!! ^^ I'm in Hong Kong now! Yesterday I travelled here by myself. My mum was supposed to come too, but end up she didn't, for a reason I'd rather not disclose. Anyway, I was rather upset about not spending christmas with her, but my dad was going to Hong Kong too, just that he was going to meet me there. Let's say that I've been crying more than I ever had this month. About something yet again, I'd rather not disclose. *sigh* Well, travelling by myself was a new adventure and experience for me, kinda got the feeling of excitement and apprehension. It was alright anyway. My dad picked me up from the airport then it was off to shopping with my friend Louiseanne and her friends! It was kinda fun, but tiring. Shopping is tiring anyway. =P Bought loads of Christmas presents and make up. (I'm broke now =X) Got to get more money from my dad. ^^ I've been getting this accent since I've come here, under Louiseanne's influence =P HAha.. The kind of international school accent. It's kinda cool! Haha, naturally comes. Hopefully it doesn't stick when I go back to Singapore! Or I will sound kind of weird to you guys in Singapore =P Today we went to watch After the Sunset. In Singapore I bet it's NC-16, but there aren't any ratings here apparently. Well, it was fun!!! I'm so glad that Louiseanne and I can get along like before, the years didn't seem to have happened in a way, seems like I've been talking to her everyday. It's great. But Jonathan(her brother) seems a little more distant. Oh how I remember the times we had when we were young!!! It was hilarious!!! Anyway, I want to watch Tarzan now, so.... GoOdNiGhT!!!~

`+._ bRiEf UpDaTe _.+`



Hi everyone! Well.. On Sunday, I went for my grand aunty's birthday lunch, followed by slacking and shopping at Parkway. I bought my Harry Potter Original dvds!!! =D I bought The Polar Express Soundtrack as well and Bing Crosby's White Christmas songs. I love Christmas carols! The minute I came back, I glued myself infront of the television screen and watched all the special features on the extra disc ^^ All 3 of them!! Hmph, but they made the things I want to see so difficult to find! I was getting a little frustrated, especially about the 1st movie's extra features. Eventually I found it though. It was worth it ^^ Definately great! On Monday... I woke up late and packed my room. (It was in a HUGE mess. Trust me, I didn't touch and care about the cleanliness of my room from after school let out, all my things were all over the place.) I packed till about 4 before I had to set out for Anchorpoint by Taxi for the Hip Hop recital rehearseal. My teacher had come down with the chicken pox last minute unfortunately. So another teacher who has no idea at all what our steps are took over. Well, let's just say yesterday and today's practice had been kind of a draag. I guess it's also because of the company. I'm the only Chinese there who goes to a local school. The others are all from international school. Can't really clique I guess. But 2 of them were really friendly. Savana and Carissa. They are way more outgoing compared to us. Outgoing in different sense compared to the Singaporean way of outgoing. But all in all, I still love the practices. The distance is the only problem. I continued packing my room again this morning. Almost done. After practice, my mum and I went to Parkway to continue out shopping. Since we are going to Hong Kong (I can't wait!!!) soon, I needed some winter clothing. Tomorrow Max is coming over for awhile and she's also going to support my dance performance. Thanks Max ^^ Means alot to me =D Oh yeah, I added more Harry Potter pictures on my HArry Potter Blog. Please go visit my fanfictions blog too! Don't abandon that. So far only Rehana has visited it =( Just click on the link on this blog and you'll be there~ Leave a tag too if you visit please ^^ Well... Nothing more to say... Ciaos!~

`+._ ThE cOnCeRt _.+`



Hi all!~ Today was my mother's childcare's annual concert. It was great! But very tiring. One of the N1s, Nigel, was so cute on stage! We were so worried that he might cry, but he stole the performance! He even tried to do a 'handstand'. So cute.. The whole performance was great... I was so tired when I came back but aftr a bath, I was refreshed, so I continued with my setting up of the Harry Potter Fanfictions webpage. It's quite nice to me, I'm satified with it. But all comments are welcomed, I placed a tag-board there, so feel free to voice your opinion. Cheerios for now!~